Playground Report

S has a new friend at the playground. The trouble is that I can't stand this girl's parent. S's friend is really nice and plays well with her. Nowadays, everytime we set out to the playground, S asks if this girl's going to be there. And I think to myself "I hope not".

I was telling a friend about this situation and he asked what is it about this parent that I don't like. I realized that it wasn't a "bad first impression" type thing. This person is not crass, loud, or dumb, yet after every interaction with this parent, I have a more negative impression. It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion. It's ugly and disturbing, but you can't stop yourself from watching it happen.

Example 1: It's hot and muggy in NYC and most playgrounds in the city have sprinklers for kids. S wanted to go play in the sprinklers so we put on her UV blocking bathing suit and headed out. We get to the playground and guess who's right at the sprinklers. I felt the temperature rise 10 degrees.

I get the additional sunblock on S (she's up to 2000 SPF by now) and she goes over to the next bench with her Dora ball to play with the girl. I turn to the stroller to put the can of Coppertone away, turn around, and this parent is leading S and 2 other girls to the middle of the playground so they can play with the ball. What the hell is going on? Since when is it ok to lead a child away from her parent without asking permission or at least hollering "Hey, dude, I'm taking your kid away. Is that cool?"

Example 2: Fast forward 20 minutes. The 2 other girls run for the tire swings. S is busy with some other kid but spots them and wants to go over. My 3 year old calls out to me that she's going over to the tires, or at least that's how my mind plays it back in my head. So she gets there and because she's a 3 year old she starts to climb on the tire swing herself at which point "the parent" picks her up and tries to put her on the swing. "By myself, by myself" S says to which "the parent" responds "we don't want to get the other girls dirty, do we".

WHAT!?!? You're at a fucking playground with dirt and mud and kids' snot all over. Just 30 minutes ago you had no problems when your kid was playing by the sprinklers. And your kid isn't dressed for a fucking cotillion, so chill out and let my kid get on the swing by herself!

Needless to say, my tolerance scale for this parent is hovering around 2 minutes.

Parent: "We're leaving to run an errand"
Me (to myself): Tanks gud
Parent: "We'll be back in an hour. Will you guys still be here"
Me: "We're leaving in about 45 minutes."
Parent: "OK then see you tomorrow"
Me (to myself): "I sure hope not"